Help! E.C Moms out there I need some advice / support please! Finley has decided she WILL NOT sit on the potty. This is quite a shift because Finley has been pooping no problem on the potty since she was 4 moths old. She even signs "toilet" at me before she has a bowel movement and I have had time enough to get her onto the potty so she can go. In the past three weeks everything has changed. I'm having a very difficult time getting Finley to acknowledge that she has to poo, she has stopped signing potty and refuses to sit on the potty. She makes her body rigid in a standing position while screaming and yelling.
I have two scenarios to share that I think is the root cause of this behaviour.
The First NUMBER TWO Set Back:
On our last day in Costa Rica, we were driving on the number one highway (no pun intended) and had been for over four hours with one short break for lunch. It is insane driving the number one highway. Hours earlier we had come across the after math of a huge accident involving three transport trucks. All we saw were the firemen leaving the scene and the black carcases of the three trucks. Traffic was backed up bumper to bumper, there are no shoulders on the road to escape the traffic or to try to pull over or squeeze by, however, the driver's still attempt to pass! We were 20 minutes away from the car rental and were right on target to drop the car early and save ourselves another day's rental. This is of course the perfect timing for Fin to sign poo at me from her car seat.
"Steve pull over we have to let Fin out of her seat to poop!" I demand. "Sorry Michelle it's not safe to pull over here. She's a baby wearing a diaper she can poo in it." he says. "UUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH, Noooo Steve, she knows not to poo in it - I need to get her onto the potty!" I'm now very insistent. I am told it's not a big deal. Babies and old people poop in their diapers it's a fact of life. "Luckily, Steve says, "we are here to clean her so she doesn't get skin breakdown. She can poo this one time in her diaper. " He was right. Where were we going to go? There was nowhere to stop and I was not going to take Fin out of her seat in a moving vehicle on this insane freeway.
Fin is frantically signing her sign for poo at me - we have been using the sign and the potty for six months now and I have seen very very few poo's in her diaper. I tell her I am sorry we cannot take her out of her seat and tell her it's okay to poo because I don't want her to become the Freudian anally fixated kid who holds everything in! Finley begins to get mad because I am not responding to her in our usual way - which is to whisk her to the potty. Then she cries and poops in her diaper while strapped snuggly into her car seat. She then had to sit in it for another 15 minutes until we made our destination and it was safe for me to take her out of her seat to change her. Our E.C communication breakdown ... the trust was broken. I've seen only one poo in a potty since then.
The Second NUMBER TWO Setback:
The second number two set back may actually be due to the advancements Fin has made in the past few weeks. The child is now signing and communicating all kinds of words to us to indicate what she wants. She has not signed "potty" in two weeks however. She has also started walking. Not cruising from one thing to another, she actually stands up in the middle of the room without pulling up on anything and toddles all around the house. She is so fascinated with this new ability she won't take the time to stop to do much else. It's a struggle to get her to stop to eat and get dressed, she just wants to tear it up.
I am continuing to communicate with her. When she wakes up and after her meals I put her on the potty - the same drill we've been doing for months. She arches her back, yells and has even tried to bite me! A few minutes of this and I am not winning the battle. I put a chlorene free disposable diaper on her or a cloth diaper with a disposable flushable liner in it and send her on her way. She plays for a bit then makes the funny face. I say; "Are you pooping?" She looks at me smiles devilishly and then she drops to her knees busts into a speedy crawl to get away from me and will even hide until her business is done. SERIOUSLY! So she knows what she is doing and I clearly do not.
I am nothing if not stubborn and I will get her back on the potty.