I felt beautiful! I felt stylish. I felt svelte. Yeah, I said svelte. Like old yoga body me...and then I caught a reflection in a store window. HOLY CRAP! Who's hips are those? I actually stopped and turned to look to see who was behind or beside me - clearly this could NOT be my reflection?
There I stood - all by myself - staring into the department store window.
Yes, that is MY reflection and those are my hips. I turn side profile - thankfully my ass was not wide - I was only growing belly forward and hips wider. I guess I don't look that bad I tried to tell myself as my self image and esteem dropped a few notches. I hear the childhood chide "take a picture it lasts longer" coming from a voice inside my head. Not today, no pictures of me today. I stood fixated unable to stop staring at the girl in the reflection in the window for a few minutes longer. She really was me.
Well, so long as my ass and thighs do not grow out to meet the side of my hips - it won't be that bad, I tell myself. Maybe, if I keep getting wider I will have to staple a red flag on each hip like they do with lumber hanging out the trunk of cars on the highway to warn people to keep a wide birth. Maybe?
I reach into my handbag for a granola bar, unwrap it and stare at it before taking a bite. I vow to wear longer sweaters with these jeans - and bigger boots to offset the pear shape I was quickly becoming. I can camoflage this with simple oversize accessories! I vow that for the next week I am only going to teach leg strengthening, hip and bottom slimming yoga postures in all my yoga classes. It will be good for the students too, I tell myself...ulterior motives thinly veiled. Removing my gaze from the window I carry on with my Christmas shopping, striking names off my list, forgetting about the window's reflection.
On my walk home I passed another reflection in a store window.
This reflection was not of me. The sun was in just the perfect position to remove the object from the frame leaving only a shadow. Standing in the right postion created a most beautiful relfection. This one warranted a photo!
The message was clear. It didn't say, "HELLO WIDE LOAD" it said "LIVE LOVE LAUGH."
This time I snapped the photo and happily walked home. Live Love Laugh (no matter how wide your hips are).