Whoaaa! A Way Over Due Post

Well the last of our company has just gone home this morning and for the first time it's just Fin, Cecil and I sitting in Steve's new GIANT lazyboy (the lazy boy I protested having in our house for years and have- since it's arrival- taken over as my breastfeeding station. Don't worry Steve you can sit in it every 4th night or something - we can negotiate!). I thought I would panic at the idea of spending the day home alone for the first time but I am actually looking forward to it. Steve and I have come to realize that we have spent only TWO nights home alone without guests since Fin's arrival and she is now one month old!

Right now I am waiting for Fin to wake up with a bear in her belly waving her head back and forth foraging my chest in her quest to eat some boobies. She ate at 10:30PM then at 5:25 AM - the child slept through the night which means I too slept through the night for the 1st time in four weeks. Steve woke up and asked if she was okay? Should the baby have slept through the night? I figure it's a bonus - not the norm. She ate every 2 hours for the past few days and has had gas and probably some growing pains. She's probably sleeping off her growth spurt my friend Nee said.

Since Finley arrived we have been getting the hang of managing the house and laundry (with help from Dad & Meg ). I put Fin in her vibrating chair or wear her in the sling while I run around with the vacuum or clean a bathroom. Finley does not mind the "daytime" sounds going on around her. Yesterday, after I fed her I popped her into her sling and we did groceries together - just the two of us. We made it to Walmart, bought the groceries and drove home - in an hour and a half total- while she slept. It was excellent. Walmart grocery section is not that bad at 8am!

We are cloth diapering - we have 23 diapers and I do a load every other day. The weather has been in the upper 80's so they dry quickly outside on the dry rack. Fin likes to poop the second I change her into a new clean diaper. The other day I went through four diapers in one hour!

HAHAHA - While hanging out having a feed in her Dad's lazy boy Finley let a ripper go in her pants loud enough to wake the dead. The sound scared the dog right off the chair! I was laughing so hard my boob popped out of Fin's mouth and was spraying milk, Finley was rooting trying to get back on while squeezing her eyes shut shielding them from spray, the dog was shaking while looking at us like we were the sole survivors of a natural disaster from his new position on a pillow across the room. I may have to register the dog for some counselling as he may be suffering some Post Traumatic Stress after this baby's behind bombing.

So Far So Good On Our 1st Fin & Mom Day

It's the first time:

 I gave Finley Mae a bath - alone.

The first time I took a shower while Fin was snoozing in her co-sleeper.

Our first outing in the stroller. We went to the Farmer's Market and bought some gorgeous spinach and red lettuce and Finley bought me a big bouquet of peonies with her allowance.

Fin slept and I set to work restoring order to my house which makes me happy, cleaning bathrooms, doing laundry, and mopping floors. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

And now at 2:30PM I am having some lunch...this means for certain Finley will wake up and scream for her lunch too...she only likes to eat when I do. Who wants to dine alone? Not Finley!

More to come and pictures too. This is a window into our new life. I love it.

I am a newborn.

In week 20 of the pregnancy journey I have really come to understand that I am no longer the boss of me.  Yup. It took me 20 weeks to figure this out.  

I have always been headstrong, independent and able bodied.  I have fought hard for things I believe in, my family, my career, my relationship, my committees. I have been guilty of working too much, playing hard, wearing myself out physically and mentally only to back off and reboot so I could to launch into it all over again.  It's a pattern with me.  In those burn out times I remind myself to get back to working moderately, eating well, exercising and sleeping better. Only the last time I did this - I vowed to stick to it - and I have made the latter my new pattern in a conscious attempt to balance out my life.  Michelle on half speed is still twice as fast as most on full speed.  It's just me. 

This was working well for the most part until ... pregnancy. Suddenly my career, my play, my exercise, my relationship, my sleep - is ours.  Me, me, me, my, has become you, you, you, we, ours. 

I thought I was ready.  I have very new nieces and nephews and have seen first hand the commitment to rearing the young.  I just didn't know it starts so soon in pregnancy.  At week nine my mother in law emailed to ask how I was feeling.  I told her I was ready to move the fridge beside the toilet and just camp out there.  I was wearing a path into the floor between the bathroom and the fridge.  Not to mention I had not slept in days. I was either up to go to the fridge or the bathroom every half- hour. It was SO annoying.  I was annoying myself.  

Each day would start with a plan to clean out the last of boxes in the office, vaccuum the house, plant the spring bulbs, and write an article. But, shortly after my morning shower baby would take over and say  - hey you,  lady, it's nap time, I'm STARVING, or let's skip to the lou...NOW!

Needless to say my responsiblities around the house and work were slipping to lows I had never let my self experience.  The super odd thing was - I didn't even care.  I was so tired.

By weeks 15 - 19 I was sleeping like a baby or so the expression goes. The weather had cooled off,  I was wearing my favorite flannel Pj's and was nestled into bed for perfect nights sleep.  Ah, starting to feel like old me - only fatter - I can handle this.   Baby was cooperating with me - we were sharing the host body quite amicably.   The house became Ship shape,  I did get to the boxes, the articles and to hosting company again.  My world was right. Our world was right.

And then sleep became illusive.  I began awakening to allergy attacks.  No, no symptoms other than a stuffy nose. Oh I hope I am not getting sick. I  dip into the vitamin C.  The next night I am in for a repeat show.  Honeslty this is a nightmare.  It's like being dragged to the worst play night after night and being made to sit in the front row.  Up and down for the nose, the chap stick now necessary due to the new mouth breathing technique I have adopted, then for a sip of water, which leads to the pee break and a new cycle begins.  

Apparently, a stuffy nose in the night is very common in the second trimester.  There is no cold. There are no allergies - but - if you suffer allergies  they will get worse,  I read in my pregnancy guide.  Awesome! 

Last night sleep was taken to an all new high when I awoke choking at 4:30 AM.  

Steve:  Are you okay hun?

Michelle: Yeah, I am pregnant.

Steve: You are! Is it mine?

Michelle: Pretty sure.

Steve: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I get up for easily the 10th time in eight hours. 

I am pretty sure this is newborn baby boot-camp. Only I am playing newborn now. Nature has an interesting way of teaching us new patterns.