Momma in the Third Person

It's an interesting journey this motherhood one. I am 5 months in and I still find myself referring to "the momma" like she is also here but she's not me. Yeah, I speak of her in the third person. See, I just wrote it now too! Is this weird? Does anyone else do this?

I know I am Fin's momma and she knows I am the boobies. I don't know if she can separate me from a food source yet. She must be starting to know me as momma because I, and only I, can sooth her with my voice. I can get her to giggle and screech but so can the dog. So when do the "me" and the "momma" become one in my mind? Dudes I laboured for 20 hours and delivered her naturally I know she is mine. I know I am her momma, so, at what point do I reconcile that we are one?

Baby Blessing & Bead Ceremony

This is me at my shower for Baby P! 

Bead Ceremony

Everyone invited to the shower was asked to bring a bead and a blessing in the form of motherly advice and wishes for mother and baby.  The beads were thread together into a necklace that I could have as a focal point and symbol of my support network during birth and into motherhood. 

I had recently seen this ceremony roll out at another shower I had attended.  It was an amazing heartfelt emotional sharing of women - honoring their great roles in the sisterhood of women and motherhood. I immediately knew I wanted something like this for our shower.  Although no one at my shower had seen this ceremony before it was relaxed and rolled out beautifully. It brought our room together and it included those too far to travel to the shower to become present in the room by sending in their words and beads becoming as much a part of the shower and memory as though they were there in person.

Below is a picture of my gorgeous seester Sue reading the most beautiful words written by my Auntie Ann.  We were all a puddle as Ann's first words and set of beads were honoring my mother.  My seester and I have always thought of our mom as a tiny white cabbage butterfly ever since she passed away. When ever we see one we say hey look mom is here! Ann chose a white butterfly bead with a white pearl on either side to represent Sue & I.   Ann's bead for herself was a natural stone.  She spoke of representing earth and nature and the adventures Steve and I will share in the outdoors with our wee Baby P.  She reminded us that it is not what money can buy but time shared as a family in the simplest form that is truly what matters.

I received two HEIRLOOM beads. 

First my Uncle Neil sent along a seashell he had gotten at the Granby Zoo when he was 12!  He had kept it all these years and now it has a home on my necklace.  My Aunt Dianne passed along a beautiful blue glass bead that had belonged to my Great-Great Grandmother Louisa. She had had this bead tucked into her jewelry box just waiting for the right time to bring it out.

  How cool is that?

This bead represents "I Love you to the Moon and Back" a line from the book Guess How Much I Love You - my cousin Jen's favorite book to read to her son Wyatt. She said - Just wait - there is no greater love than the love you will have for your child. It's unfathomable until it happens.

Voila my boobs...I mean beads!

As you can see Baby P and I were blessed with so many wonderful beads. Bumpy ones to represent the bumps along the road, a Betsey Johnson bead so baby will have style and friends who give them Betsey just like mommy, wings to show baby P how to soar on her/his own, a multi faceted bead to represent all sides of parenting, heart shaped beads to represent my friends beautiful children and for love.  

Advice: community helps raise a child,  reminders that a mother's "me" time makes for a more grounded mother - not to forget to take some, sleep when the baby sleeps, laugh a lot- you need a sense of humour to parent, be patient and lead by example.

Beads arrived from:  My cousin Chris and his girlfriend Angie sent from Vancouver, beads and blessings from Steve's cousins Laurie and Kelly and Aunts Cindy and Judy mailed in from Windsor, London and Chatham Ontario.